My personal Grief experiences

Throughout my life I have had experiences with grief and loss. I learned in my grief and loss class with Dr. Ruff that grief and loss can come in forms other than a loss of a loved one. Some of these losses include relocation, divorce, and the loss of a pet. I have have experienced all three types of loss. My parents split up at a young age, and at the time I couldn't understand it. I was so hurt because I just wanted my family to be together. I never blamed myself for the end of their relationship, but I always wished there was something I could do to help. As I got older, I realized that people grow a part and sometimes just because you love someone it doesn't mean you two are meant to be together. Talking to my parents, sister, and the rest of my family definitely helped me cope with the situation.

When I was 14 years old, my dog died. Most people wouldn't think this would be a big deal, but it was a devastating loss for me. My dog, who my sister and I so naively named him Ruff, had been a part of my family since i was two years old. I remember first getting him as a puppy and always having him around. He protected us, he played with us, and he loved us. Unfortunately, towards the end of middle school, Ruff's health began to decline. For reasons unknown to me, he developed a type of dog cancer (which I never knew existed). Eventually it became hard for him to do many things including walk, so as a family and with the doctor's recommendation, we decided to put him to sleep. It was the hardest thing for me to handle and I cried so much. Every time I came home after his death, I would expect to see him come running towards me, or the hear him bark, but it never happened. I still miss him to this day, but I know that he is in a better place.

My family has dealt with the pain of the death of a loved one many times. But most recently I have been trying to cope with the death of my great-grandmother. My great-grandmother or Nana as we called her, was 95 years old when she past away. She was so full of life and wisdom. Her health was declining and I became one of her caregivers. During this 5 year period, I grew to be so close with her. We would talk about love, life, my goals and ambitions. This past summer I got to spend a lot of time with her and truly enjoyed her spirit. She passed in October 2009 a week before her 96th birthday, and although it was hard for me to deal with, I know that it was her time; she was ready to go. I still think about her from time to time but as each day goes by it gets easier. The journal assignments in my grief and loss class definitely help. Learning about the different stages of grief and getting the proper support have also been a big help.

Grieving isn't easy, but time heals all wounds and can even sometimes make you feel better.

-Adrienne GLasgow